3 week update

when in bed last night I realised that it has now been three weeks since i stopped taking Vanlafaxine! despite the pneumonia i feel i am doing ok... here is my updated daily supplements routine.. my new magic pills:

AM:
50mg 5 htp
High Strength Omega 3
Multi Vitamin and Mineral
B Vitamin Complex with Vitamin C
Probiotic
Evening Primrose Oil

PM:

50mg 5 htp
High Strength Omega 3
Probiotic
Evening Primrose Oil


I am taking Kalms night or Nytol if needed.

beautiful bedtimes

I have wanted to get some new bedding ever since we moved into our new house in October! This is on my wish list for payday.. bit of retail therapy http://www.urbanoutfitters.co.uk/bin/venda?bsref=urbanoutfitters&log=22&mode=add&curpage=&next=undefined&ex=co_disp-shopc&buy=5532038250006&invt=5532038250006&ivref=5532038250006&bklist=&att1=Brown&att2=ALL&qty=1

Also on my shopping list:

Body brush for improved circulation and nice bath times
An eye test and some new glasses for a spruced up look
Supplements-more probiotic and 5 htp (post on how this is going soon!)

things i get sad about....

Comparing myself to other I am always inferior: Looks, holidays, social life, lifestyle, their happiness

That I give up on things i.e diet and exercise

That I don't have hobbies. I haven't found anything I enjoy or that I am good at.

Being sick/ ill

Having anxiety/depression all my life

Not having money to do things (being bad with my money)

Wasting my life.. dont know what I want to do, I dont want children, have no real aims or goals anymore.

Being lonely: don't have many friends, lack of social life, never go out or get invited anywhere.

Comparing my life to how it was; I have lost touch with groups of friends, i used to go out and be social but now don't. I used to have fun.

when does it get better

pneumonia

Day 13: So I tried to go to work on Monday after being up since 2:30am and having the worst weekend: coughing lungs up, blocked sinuses, wheezing, short of breath and heart palpitations.

Turns out I have pneumonia.

Words cant even describe how horrid and low I feel.

Have to take a week off work and really stressed about that. Antibiotics make me feel sick and keep getting panicky.

Who knows how long I can carry on like this.....

food and mood

Days 4 and 5: I have been to work!!!!!! this has been a constant fight and every second I feel sick or am in pain or feel like i'm losing my mind. Food seems to be really important to me at the moment, almost a marker of how ill I am- I think if I keep going fueling myself then I can keep going. 


I have been continuing to manage my symptoms with supplements-my routine is currently:


Vitamin C x3 daily
High Strength Omega 3 x3 daily
Painkillers
Kalms/Valerian tea 
Nytol at night


I have also ordered some 5 Htp and will see how that works. 


My symptoms are moving more into the flu like ones that are often described-the headache is still a killer but I have had less brain zaps and my heart seems a bit more stable in my chest! I do seem to get shivers and sometimes my whole body feels as though it is clenched. Sleeping is Ok once I can get to sleep but I get very agitated at night and find it hard to get comfortable. 


Have been doing loads of research and trying to boost the foods I should be eating so my cupboards and fridge includes:


Tuna-rich in Omega 3 but I am taking supplements too


Whey protein, offered by milk and other dairy products, has also been shown to reduce SSRI withdrawal symptoms like anxiety and frustration (this may be why I am drinking pints of milk-mega cravings!!!)


Bananas - supply mood-boosting carbohydrates and vitamin B6.


Oatmeal (porridge) and sweet potatoes and loads of turkey that provide the amino acid L-tryptophan which also trigger the release of serotonin


Foods that provide the B vitamin folate, such as spinach, whole grains, lentils and beets, are essential for maintaining healthy serotonin levels.


Chocolate- comforting and well...its chocolate!!!


 Almonds and spinach, rich in magnesium which is a critical nutrient when it comes to fighting stress and anxiety


I also find that eating regularly (every few hours) helps as it keeps my blood sugar levels up.. I have a glass of milk in the morning and some almonds and raisins for brekkie.